Good Morning

So grateful for another day. Did I dream last night? I have no memory of one if I did. Is my poor memory Thy mercy? If I forget is it not like it never happened? I’ve been thinking a lot about my mother’s situation. If she forgets everything that is ever happened to her good and bad is it mercy or cruel. Is the struggle of life even worth having if in the end it’s as if it never happened? If in the end everyone who has ever known you or loved you forgets you and dies and the life you’ve lived becomes as inconsequential as a dream that maybe did not even happen? A forgotten memory. A fleeting thought. An inspired thought not acted upon? If so why do I worry? Why do I care? Why does my conscience speak to me? Why? Is this the meaning of my life? To love. To hate. To live and die and be forgotten? To forget all that ever happened and everything I’ve ever done as if it never happened and evolve back to nothingness? What’s the point? Is there a point? Is the struggle all there is? To live. To survive. To serve. To succeed. To fail. To remember to forget. To live to die. To wonder why. To reason. To cry. To laugh. To try? To never really know. To live on faith alone. Is this home? Is this where I live? A wonderful day this will be. Knowing you are with me. Helping me try. Giving me a why. Will I even know when die? Is getting to know Thee the reason why? In knowing Thee do I find me? Help me see. Help me remember Thee. Amen.

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